October 19, 2012- John Taylor Book Signings

 I can’t believe that I actually met John Taylor twice this week. I didn’t tell Amy about going to the signing in Ridgewood yet because I was pretty embarrassed that I even did so. Naturally, my brother is saying that I must be obsessed with him which is upsetting. Amy would just say to ignore him.

   I would have only gone to the NYC one if there was not a train that went to Ridgewood. I had done research into this a few weeks beforehand.

   I took the 6:05 a.m. bus into the city and got there by 7:00. I had intended on going to the Plaza because John was a guest on the” Today” show but part of me was feeling too afraid and embarrassed to do this. I chose to drink coffee at that bus terminal instead.

   I finally got over those feelings and decided to head on over to that location. I didn’t really get to see him that much then though because a screen came down over the window during his interview. I could have watched this on the TV screen that was in the Plaza but my idiot side wouldn’t let me.

   I found out from two girls that John had been sitting on the couch close to the window earlier. I would have seen this if not for my fear and shame issues. I sort of wish that I hadn’t even known about this.

   I saw Chris Rock and Martha Stewart who were outside for their segments. I took a few pictures of them. The ones that I took of John through the window didn’t come out that good.

   I couldn’t find the Barnes & Noble but was too afraid to ask anyone where it was. I did eventually get up enough nerve to do so but didn’t go there right away. I went into Starbucks and had a cappuccino.

   When I bought the book, I told the cashier that I was doing this for a friend, that’s how ashamed I was to be there for this signing.

   It felt a little weird to be hearing DD music throughout this event. I also was feeling a bit depressed being around books. I used to love reading but for years now it has been hard even getting through a short magazine article.

   The only book that I was able to read this year was one about Katie the Cocker Spaniel. I really enjoyed that as did Mom. Hopefully, it won’t be too difficult and frustrating when I am reading JT’s book.

   I didn’t even feel like talking to anyone. I did listen in on the other fan’s conversations. The girls behind me had tickets for the lecture/Q&A event that John would be doing that night in the city. I was a little jealous of them; I had been unsuccessful in getting a ticket to that.

   I would have been further up in the line if I hadn’t spent like 45 minutes in Starbucks. But then I would have probably missed John’s grand entrance. I think that he said “Hey, I know all of you”. I liked the scarf that he was wearing.

   I was not quick enough to snap a shot of him then. Most of the pictures that I did take that day came out not that great. Maybe there would have been better shots if I wasn’t holding onto the book in one hand. I don’t know why I just didn’t keep it in my tote bag until I got up to the table.

    I told the lady employee near the table that I am klutzy and was afraid that I would drop the book. I wonder if John heard that. I did say “Hello” and “It was nice to meet you” to him. But I also said a couple of really stupid things too.

   A guy (was he a store employee?) was taking photos for each person using their cameras. I said “I will just uglify the picture” and also “I have a pretty crappy camera.” I shouldn’t have said either thing.

  John had shaken my hand; maybe he did so because he felt sorry for me. The guy said that I got a special privilege regarding this but I know that he was just joking.

   When I looked at the photo that he had taken, I saw that I nor he had not adjusted the zoom so we are too close up. Part of John’s one ear got cut off as did part of my hair. I was really upset about this.

   Also, there is a girl behind the table- another employee, I guess- who is in between us because I was too afraid to get that close to John. That sucks as well.

   I saved the bag that the book was in and not just because John touched it. I had nearly left it on the table and he handed it to me. I just want to keep the book inside of it. I have it and 2 others, his audio book, and about 8 DD 45s in a small container.

    I was really embarrassed when a security guy told me to move along afterwards. I had heard him saying this to other people who were standing around in that area trying to take photos. And yet I attempted to do the same thing; how dumb was that?

    I wish that I had been in a better mood that day and that my self-esteem was not so low. This made the experience less enjoyable. I was feeling tense being in the city- the noise, the crowds, and craziness of it all. I was so relieved when I finally got home.

   Shouldn’t I have just been totally thrilled that I got to meet John Taylor? Yes, this was a pleasure but all those other negative factors, including my screw ups, sort of tainted this encounter. It sort of seems like one of my strange holodeck dreams, in a way.